Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Marraige Counseling, My New Job .....


I have been absent for a bit. Blogger has refused to let me play! I could read, but not comment or post.

I have been busy in my gardens. Every other year the local electric company contracts to have the limbs trimmed near the lines. I very graciously let the trucks dumb the chipped wood here. Free mulch for me. Not as fine a mulch as I might like, but free. The last truck was cedar and it smells amazing. I hauled 55 five gallon buckets up to my side yard and mulched non-stop for 2 days. I need about 30 more buckets to finish my project, but the rain is keeping me in today.

So what interesting events have been going on here? Repeat business .... or so he said. I didn't remember him, but I will now. The man came in and said he needed a spot to park his fifth wheel. Okay. I wait to see if he is going to elaborate ..... does he want to dry store it, is he traveling and needs a site for one night ........ He just stands looking at me and then says, "It happened again. I just threw my stuff in the truck and left. I haven't had a shower in two days." I try to keep my expression neutral and it must have worked, because he then said, "It's me. I was here a few years ago when me and my old lady had a fight. She is back at it again, so I guess I'll just stay here and try to find work."

This is way more information than I need to hear, but I have concluded that he is looking for a spot to rent on a monthly basis. So, I ask, "How long do you think you will be needing a site?" I thought it was a reasonable question. He says, "I don't know. Who knows what she is going to do next?" Not me, that is certain. I explain to him that I am booked solid for Memorial Day weekend and do not have a long term site available. This seems to confuse him and I have to explain two more times.

"Well, can I stay until then, maybe about a month?" I grab a calendar (big, wall size), as I think I will need a visual aid for this next explanation. He finally gets it and asks me again if I remember him from his last fight with the "old lady". I don't. Since he made the comment about "finding work", I am a little anxious about how he plans to pay for a week and the merchandise piling on the counter. I am relieved to see he has cash, as I am still sitting on a bad $425 check from the last victim of "old lady" abuse.

He pays and goes to park and I head back outside to my buckets and mulch. Ten minutes later he is back. "Water? There ain't no water." says the victim of spousal abuse. I tell him I will have the maintenance man (aka He Who Plumbs) come help him. He Who Plumbs was being He Who Tows (him being a man of many titles), so I texted him with the problem and he gave me an ETA.

I gathered my buckets and rode back to my mountain of mulch, filled them and headed back when the phone rang. It was my new tenant. The water was coming through our hydrant just fine, the problem was his plumbing. Just hang onto this little nugget of info, it will appear later in the story.

The rest of that afternoon and night was uneventful and I went about my business the next day with my mulching and digging weeds. I am always happy when I have my hands in dirt. Unless I am sewing, then my hands are clean. And that is exactly what I was doing when the phone rang. " Is this Kan-Do Kampground?" asks the woman. I answer in the affirmative and she introduces herself as the wife (old lady) of my newest tenant. She wants me to go rouse him and tell him to call home. It is very important she tells me that he call her. She goes on to tell me that she has heard a lot about my park and I murmur appropriate thanks and end the call.

I had no intention of going to the site and waking this man. I planned to have He Who Mows and Tows do this. I put it on the list of non-emergency chores and keep sewing. A couple of hours later, who should appear, but the now awake tenant. I suppose he was going to ease into this "looking for work" thing. He told me he had been asleep all day and he purchased three cans of Coke to help himself wake up. I informed him about his need to call home .........

"Why didn't she just call me on my cell?" he asks. I am beginning to feel that I should add an additional charge, since he seems to view me as his counselor. He gets his cell out of his pocket and curses. "She had my phone shut down! Now how am I supposed to call her?"

I hand him my handset from my land-line. I am behind the desk and the store is not huge by any means, but I fully expect him to retreat to a corner for privacy. But, he stands there looking at me as he calls her. I don't want to be a part of this conversation, but he doesn't move. I pick up my little Cujo and start talking to him and move to the door to give the man some privacy. But, it is , after all, my store and my cash register right there!

I can't help but be privy to this tearful reunion of a man and his old lady. Yes, he was blubbering about being sorry and how much he loved her and how did she think he felt being here all alone with nothing to do but sleep? The "I miss you" and "I love you" continued, until finally he returned my phone and grinned at me. "It worked! I am pulling out and going home."

It was only 10 minutes until closing time and he says he will be up after he gets all set to go for his refund. I stop him and tell him we can take care of it right then. Now, my receipt clearly states "no refunds", but I don't enforce it unless I have good reason. I adjust his charges to daily, instead of weekly and return his portion and lock up.


Fast forward to today. I have totally put this incident out of my mind. I run my errands and come home. While unloading my car, the phone rings .......... guess who. He wants to tell me that my hydrant is not working. He says he checked it before he left and it was the problem, not his plumbing. Then he wanted to chat about his reunion with the "old lady". I cut him off, telling him I had another call ....... all the while wondering what he did to my hydrant.

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