Thursday, April 16, 2020

Three Times The Treats!

It is Cujo here again. Mom says she is uninspired and that I will have to take over today. I am okay with that, but I am not sure what uninspired means.

My Mom wakes early. Well, actually, I have been known to put my feet on her shoulder and lick the side of her face. This will always let us dogs know what kind of mood she is in. If she pushes me off and tells me "no", that is not a good sign. Most days she will just laugh and put me down on the floor, then grab Eddie so we can go outside. She tells us to do our business. Why does she say that I wondered one day when Oscar (he was quite old and wise and has left us to go mover Rainbow Bridge) told me that he thought it was because peeing and pooping was nobody's business but ours.

Even when she wakes in a bad mood, she always give me lots of kisses when I come in. I really like kisses and some times I will stand on my back legs and smash my face next to her lips …. cause I really like kisses!

While Mom gets up early, Dad sleeps. His dog, Toni Louise sleeps with him. I don't know how she does it, holding her pee that long. Maybe because she is a girl? When Dad gets up, he forgets to let her out and Mom has to do it.

A couple of weeks ago Mom asked Dad if he thought he could accomplish one project at a time. He was sure he could and told her she was being sarcastic. I didn't think she was, but, as far as I am concerned, Mom is always right. So, she asked Dad if he would re-caulk the bath tub. He agreed that he could definitely get that done in one day.

Mom handed him the tool to remove the old caulk and went to her sewing room to make masks. It wasn't long before Dad was asking where the caulk was. She told him where to look and he told her there was no caulk in that area. Mom came out of her sewing room and found the caulk right where she said it would be and even found the caulking gun while she was at it.

She started to go back to her sewing and then decided to go take a look at what he was doing. She said, "Wow, you really got the old stuff off fast," as she was walking into the bathroom. He hadn't though. I heard her tell him he had to remove all of the old caulk before he put the new caulk in. He told her he knew what he was doing and that if she didn't think he could do it, that she could.

"Oh no you don't," she said. "You are not tricking me into doing such a simple task!" He should learn not to try to outsmart my Mom! She went back to her sewing room. He went back to his project.

Next thing you know, I am awakened by the sound of something loud whirring away in the bathroom. I don't know if I told you, but Dad likes noisy stuff. Mom came in from her sewing room and she heard it, too. She went into the bathroom and asked what he was doing. He showed her this drill thing he bought awhile back to clean things with and he was using it to get all the residue from the old grout off the tub. His battery went dead and he put it on the charger and said he would finish the next day.

He was all excited about this cleaning machine that made noise and even got up earlier than usual. He asked if we had any cleanser for the tub. Mom told him where it was and he was in the bathroom nearly all day. Mom was sewing and doing laundry and cooking. When she decided to get her shower that night she discovered that new caulk had not yet been applied, and that was not all.

"Hey," she said to Dad, sitting in his chair watching TV, "please tell me you didn't use Comet on the tile." He looked at her and said, "What do you mean?" She said, "What did I say?" in a way that made all of dogs look for a place to hide. I am pretty sure I heard the word "idiot" a lot and that he had scrubbed the finish off the tile.

This was awhile ago, like a week and the bathroom is still not finished. All of the tools he used are still in there, the trash can is full and he has not finished. Us dogs have been waiting to see who will complete this task. Toni Louise bet her treats for two days that Mom would do it and clean up after she finished. Eddie bet three days of his treats that Mom would do it and then make Dad clean up. Me? I bet a whole week of treats that Mom could hold out for quite some time since there is no chance of company and make Dad do it and clean up his own mess. So far, I am winning!

Just think, if I win I will be enjoying three times the treats for a whole week. Well, that is if Mom doesn't discover the bet we made. She has forbidden Dad from handing out more than one treat a day to us. She says I am fat! She told Dad that too much weight on my little frame is not good and she wants me to live a long healthy life. I am still not as fat as Martha, the boy cat!!


dkzody said...

Cujo, that's some fine reporting on the goings-on around your house. I just know that if you win the bet, you'll share some of those treats.

Joanne Noragon said...

Men. Arrrrrgggggghhhhh.

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Good post Cujo well done, men are frustrating they look with their eyes close and can take days to do a simple job

Val said...

Cujo, you are a an observant reporter. That green grass flatters your coloring, and was a good choice of background for your photo.

My own half-dachshund/half-heeler, Jack, LOVES to stretch his feet up on my legs and give me kisses when I bend over. He's not as long as you, and I don't bend as well as your mom, so our lovefests usually occur when he's on the side porch by the garage, and he can put his feet on my shoulders for the kisses as I walk by.

River said...

Cujo, thanks for the news and I do hope the bathroom gets properly finished soon. I hope you win the treats, but I agree you do look a little heavy, so you should stretch out the extra treats for a week or two.

sharpwalls said...

I have been reading your blog for several years. That was just hilarious. Thank you for the laugh! P.S. I am an Employment Specialist and I work for the county that I live in, except I am not working because I am a non-essential employee during this epic time of high unemployment. Isn't that funny? I am also a camper and can't go there either. On the upside, I have finally learned how to wash my hands after 64 years! Have a great day@

Linda O'Connell said...

Cujo, I will lay off the cookies if you promise to go light on the treats. This was a fun post. Home bound and interacting with an adorable doxy. What does that say about my confinement?

And it's the universal battle cry of males; "I can't find it. It's not there!" Even my great grandsons almost 2,3,6 are the same. I can even point right at it, and they will look elsewhere. Go figure.