I can't believe it has been a year since you left us. I hope you know how very missed you are. While it is true that time does dull the pain and I can smile instead of cry when I think of you, there is still that big hole in my heart where you used to reside.
It has been a whole year since I have seen your golf cart zipping down the road with your music blaring as you rode along on whatever mission you were on. Covid is still with us and still causing death and leaving grieving loved ones in the wake of it's death wave. I lost my sister this year. I felt your presence as we traveled to bid her farewell. Have you met her yet? Are you the one who made her stop putting roadblocks in my way, or was that my Daddy? I can just see you now on your winged golf cart zipping around trying to meet everyone who may have known your living friends, saying "It's all good!"
I miss your big laugh. I think of you every time I make macaroni and cheese. Remember when you offered me a boxed mix and I disdained it, telling you that I would be serving the real stuff. You tried to tell me the boxed stuff was just as good ... then you tasted mine and asked for the leftovers. I would give anything to make it for you again!
Almost everything here brings an image of you to mind. Looking out at the pond in the evening hours and seeing you sitting in that golf cart watching the traffic on the highway. I remember sitting with you while everyone here gathered to watch a car carrier full of new cars burn in the rest area. Was it you who brought the pizza?
We haven't had an outdoor movie since you left us. It just wouldn't be the same, somehow. You were always the one to set it up and then complain that I had gotten a G rated movie. You would tell me the next day that you liked the movie, though. Your wilderness trail is still here, though not groomed. You were the driving force of so many things here, it would be hard to list them all.
We will gather today to remember you. I will wear my Kevin's Tribe shirt in your honor, even though it is the wrong shade of red! It does not compliment my skin type. There will, no doubt be some tears, and a whole lot of laughter. "Remember that time" will be the spoken a lot. Fireball shots all around, but I will wait until my workday ends. I know you will be watching from your perch up there in heaven. If you haven't met her yet, go find my sister. She will entertain you with her southern accent and tales of her encounters on earth. You both have my permission to talk about me. If my ears start to burn, I will know why!
Just know that you are loved and missed down here. You were the brother I always wanted.
Your sister by chance,