Monday, February 10, 2020

Good Jeans/Bad Jeans

As I sit and wait for the plumber to arrive, I have time to meditate on the past week of water. As it stands (literally), I lost, water won. Hopefully the culprit will be revealed today.

In the meantime, as laundry continues to pile up (there will be an entire load of wet socks), let's see what HeWho is not a plumber has been up to. As you all know I have recently purged our closets and removed all of the clothes that have outgrown the shrinking man. Despite the fact that I have bought clothes to fit him, he still grabs the baggy ones that are a full 4" too big. My clothes, on the other hand, have been set aside to go to the sewing room to be altered to fit my smaller self.

Before you ask yourself why I don't just alter his jeans ….. jeans are hard to alter, especially men's with all those pockets and belt loops. Not to mention all the stains on his. We have chlorine, pool paint, mud and grease, sometimes all on one pair with various rips and tears. He never manages to rip them in a spot that would look like it was meant to be.

I was sure I had eliminated all of his too big jeans until I happened to look at his backside last Monday night while on the phone with our daughter. "Where did you get those jeans?" I screeched. He assured me they were "in my closet". Never mind that we share a closet and his closet is also mine. Adrienne and I started laughing together as I described the saggy bottom on the jeans her dad had on. She has seen him wear jeans that are his size and still with a saggy bottom because for whatever reason he would insist on buy the "full cut". The man has no butt and skinny legs.

I did some laundry Tuesday, thinking the water problem had been resolved by HeWho is not a plumber. While I was folding laundry, I grabbed a pair of his new jeans and demonstrated the difference between "good jeans" and "bad jeans" when I picked up the pair he had worn Monday …….

And that is when I realized he had worn a pair of my jeans that were in my stack of pants waiting to be altered!!! They were too big for my ample bottom! He wore those to re-hab! He went out in public in ladies jeans!!! "I wondered why they were so short." says HeWho is not a plumber. Most people would have taken them off to investigate. Well, normal people would. Not my husband. I never want to meet those people at his re-hab facility. What would they think of me, letting him leave the house in ladies jeans?


Val said...

Oh my gosh! And he wondered why they were so short!

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Finding jeans that fit can be difficult for me, I had a good laugh about HeWho wearing your jeans.

Joanne Noragon said...

Haha. And next up, the answer!
When my girls were young and money tight, my dryer quit one day. The repairman found a pair of scissors had shorted the dryer coil. The scissors belonged to oldest daughter, and for not emptying her pockets, I deducted the $50 repair bill from her allowance (the seventies).
One more time the dryer quit, and the girls were glued to the poor repair man, waiting to see what he extracted. A key. Two floors up I heard the oldest shout "That's your house key you lost!" I also heard the story of how she had left the garage doors open each day so she could get in when school was over.

River said...

Apart from being a bit short I don't see why he can't wear them. After all, women wear men's jeans. Well, I do anyway, they're much more comfortable for some reason.