Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Disgrace Is My Name

My cherry tree died. I didn't chop it down. The branches came off in my hands. I pretty much gave up hope for my sad little tree.

But, look! See the cherries? This new tree came up at the base of the tree and I have since discovered a second tree about three feet from this one.

My crab apple tree has fruit this year, too. I planted the tree five years ago and had given up on having fruit. Both peach trees are bursting with fruit and I have picked strawberries every other day for a week.

Memorial Day weekend was stormy, but with minimal complaints. The kids were able to get in the ice cold pool and get the first sunburn of the season. Lots of snow cones were consumed. As the campers all pulled out on Monday another storm brewed and the sky turned black. I have to admit I wasn't too upset to close up early and catch up on household chores uninterrupted. Even took a nap.

So, when I awoke today, I was ready for a big day at the pool. It was overcast, but I could see sunshine trying to burn through. I got myself dressed for the day and wandered through my gardens, pulling a few weeds here and there. The ground was making a slurping sound.

I made it to my strawberry patch and saw some of my seasonal campers drive in on their way back from the lake as the rain began falling again. I had all intentions of grabbing a bowl to pick strawberries. I had a few in my hand, as well as some asparagus spears. I walked along at a good pace, thinking to get inside before the sky fell. I have a stepping stone path through one of my flower beds, a little shortcut to the front of the building. The grass and the stones provide safe footing.

The parking lot is made up of a rock bed with very fine gravel on top. It is called "minus". It gets really slick when wet and can be like walking on ice. When I stepped off the last stone with my right foot, it flew from beneath me and I went down on my left knee, swiveled and landed flat on my well-padded derriere and slid further when I tried to get up (after checking to make sure there were no witnesses to my humbling experience).

My white shorts were smeared and I looked like I had been mud wrestling. I locked myself in and headed for my second shower of the day. I thought I was uninjured (except for my pride), until I saw the blood pool around my feet in the shower. My knee is pretty gouged up. I used the handheld shower head to rinse all the bits of gravel out of the gouges. It still didn't hurt so bad, just tender from the cleaning.

I was all bandaged when He Who tows came home with a milkshake. He is trying to make amends for not taking the weekend off to help me, but that is another story. He took off for another call as I was happily slurping my vanilla treat while resting my knee upon a pillow. I was quite comfy, all slouched down on the love seat with my canine trio close at hand.

There, on top of my milkshake sat a cherry. Why did I think it to be a good idea to remove the lid on the cup to try to lick this cherry into my mouth? Maybe the same reason I thought it would be a good idea to hurry across the slick parking lot.

I managed to pour the milkshake on my chest, where it pooled inside my bra. So very graceful. Toni Louise seized the opportunity to get to the remaining milk shake in the cup and Wall-E was trying to clean the front of my shirt as I struggled out of my position to claim my third shower of the day.

I have to confess that I did toy with the idea of just throwing my milky clothes in the laundry and changing, but decided I would smell like burp-up all day. Now, as night draws near, the knee throbs and my hip hurts.

The silver lining to my cloud is that my campers were not a witness to any of this! I heard the bell ring while I was tending my wounds in the shower. I knew it was you, Jackie! I am so glad you weren't in the parking lot with your phone, you would have taken my picture.


Brian Miller said...

oh my...you had a day indeed...i am glad you are no worse for wear...sad on the cherry tree...

mamahasspoken said...

Oh the indignity of it all....Hope you are feeling better.

Kathy G said...

If there's no pictorial evidence it never happened :-)

Chickadee said...

Ack! I hate it when that stuff happens. But it does make for good blogging material.

Hope your hip and knee are feeling better.

Practical Parsimony said...

I usually manage to have an audience when I have one of my frequent slips and dump myself on the ground. I fell once on gravel on asphalt. I limped in and changed my clothing and threw it in the floor. Two days late, I picked up the pants and peeled a three inch layer of knee skin from the inside of the pants. I am a klutz.