Losing My Mind

He Who mows, tows and sometimes annoys me is a sniffer. He will not blow his nose, choosing, instead to sniff loudly. And, when I say loud, I am not joking. Every morning he sniffs deeply upon awakening and continues to sniff until finally leaving the house.

It makes my head hurt to think about how deeply he pulls the air around him into his sinuses. The dust and pollen, not to mention the dog and cat hair floating in the air. When he went in for his last check-up, the nurse practitioner prescribed Flonase.

Being the savvy, money saving shopper that I am, I knew that a generic was available and that Sam's Club would have the cheapest price if we bought in volume. When HeWho made his next visit to Sam's, I added it to the list I so thoughtfully provide him with. He purchased a 6 bottle package and I carefully cut into the hard plastic and pulled all 6 bottles out. I put one next to his bedside, along with his bedtime pills and I put the other 5 away.

I have an entire shelf in the kitchen devoted to our medications, I even keep the canine and feline meds in that location. When the first month came to an end and his Flonase was empty, he asked where the rest of the bottles were. I had heard him bumbling around in the bathroom looking, but I do not keep medications there, it is too humid. I looked up and pointed to the kitchen where all the pill bottles are located in a big white plastic bin.

"You will have to be more specific." he says. So, I lowered my weary legs in my recliner and pushed various animals to the floor. I went into the kitchen and looked myself. For some reason I thought the bottles were in boxes and that is what I looked for. I pulled my step ladder out and searched that cabinet thoroughly. Couldn't find them. I checked the bathroom, although I knew they would not be there. I checked the linen closet.

For the next week I hunted periodically for Flonase. I sent him to pick up a single bottle in town, thinking I would happen upon them as soon as he bought it. He paid $15 for a one month supply of the generic brand in town and $30 for a 6 month supply at Sam's. I was really annoyed with myself that I could not find those bottles. I even looked in the spare bedroom and my closet.

So, when I made the next list for Sam's, I added Flonase along with all the ice cream and candy for the store. I put this package on his bedside table where we both could look upon it every night. I even searched again when I realized the bottles were not contained with-in individual boxes.

This morning, HeWho no longer annoys me by sniffing, thanks to the Flonase, told me his pill boxes were empty. I downed my coffee and went to the kitchen to fill pills. I got down all the big bottles of supplements and grabbed the white plastic bin of prescription meds ...........

There they were, 5 bottles sitting neatly in the plastic bin, right where I had put them over a month ago. Now, there are 11 bottles. Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.