Thursday, December 15, 2016

Place Your Bets

I am tired of winter. The nasty driving conditions means I won't be able to see my kids before Christmas. They generously offered to receive cookies via mail. It is just not the same, though.

I ventured out this morning to grab some wood for the fire. Sixteen degrees out there, but the wind was not blowing. The minute the cold air hit my eyes they began tearing and cold drops ran down my cheeks, then froze. I had every intention of filling my wagon and pulling it to the back door. I just loaded my left arm and grabbed an extra piece and hurried back inside. My toes have not been warm since I left my bed this morning.

It is supposed to be warmer tomorrow and I plan to move some wood. I will use a wagon or even the hand truck. Whatever is available to me. That's how I roll. HeWho drives is planning to replace his flat tire on the golf cart, then load the trailer with wood and move it under the shelter that will keep it dry and close to the back door. I bet I move more than he does tomorrow.

I can tell you how the day will go. He will get up, fill his cold up with Diet Coke and head to McDonald's for his morning biscuit. I know. He will swallow all his daily pills first for his high cholesterol and blood pressure and gout. If there is a pill for it, he will take it. Better than changing his diet! But that is another story to tell another time.

Greasy biscuit and unhealthy beverage in hand, he will pull into the tow yard and amble in to chew the fat with his cronies. I should say here that he is older than the rest of him, so that makes him the wiser one, right? After he wastes some time there, he will come home, sometimes with a coffee for me. A bribe.

He will then poke around in the wood stove as he tries to get the temperature above 80. Playing in the fire will prompt him to go outside to the wood pile. He will stare at the tire for a time, you know, to determine a course of action. Whatever this course of action will be, I can guarantee it will involve a trip to town to purchase something.

By now I will have done some wood hauling on my own. He will admonish me, the little (or not so, as the case may be) woman to go inside and stay warm, that he will make sure we have wood! I will obediently head indoors to warm my hands. Not so much because he told me to, but that I will be ready for that specialty coffee he brought me. He will head out and ask me three times if I need anything from town. Upon leaving, he will advise me that I can text him if I think of anything.

I will go back out and haul more wood in his absence, and be on my second load of laundry and be planning dinner. It will be early afternoon before he gets that tire fixed .... and that is if all goes well. I will pull a wagon full as I push the hand truck full. If I make 4 or 5 trips, I should be able to stack a sizable load of wood by the back door.

Go ahead, place your bets.

6 comments:

Val said...

All bets are off!

What you need is a screaming orange hunter's sock cap (youth size) to hold in your body heat. Lest you think I'm crazy (but you won't, because you know I am married to HeWho's unofficial brother from another mother) that's how Hick helped me out staying warm yesterday.

Linda O'Connell said...

Oh you will win hands down...and frozen. I hate winter. Sorry you won't see your babies. I have 6 flags tickets for the weekend holiday lights, but looks like the weather is not going to cooperate. Bah humbug, winter!

Linda O'Connell said...

Oh you will win hands down...and frozen. I hate winter. Sorry you won't see your babies. I have 6 flags tickets for the weekend holiday lights, but looks like the weather is not going to cooperate. Bah humbug, winter!

Joanne Noragon said...

All the money is on you. Keep warm.

ellen abbott said...

mine's not a doer either. what gets done around here, I do. mostly. though he did call the plumber when the water heater started to leak.

carol pavlik said...

We have a perfectly good furnace but Davy Crockett insists on hauling in wood. We have eight grown kids between us, but this 77 year old man is hauling in wood. Shameful.