Tuesday, June 1, 2010

....Perfect Harmony.......

If you come to my campground and enter the office you will be confronted with Coca-Cola. I have some vintage things and some not, but the latest addiction is puzzles. They are on the walls and usually one on a table still under construction. You are welcome to sit a spell and fit in a piece or two while having coffee and a chat with the witty, engaging hostess (that would be me).


I only mention this because I was thinking about that song that was so popular a few (more than a few?) years back. The whole world was holding hands and singing......... 'I'd like to teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony..........' . I have a fantasy. In this fantasy I awaken all the sleepy campers and line them up. I blow my whistle for attention and then I DEMAND to know who defamed the bathrooms. When the culprit steps forward, they are given the necessities with which to correct their infraction. Then all the dog owners are put in a separate line and are treated to the same interrogation. Those who have failed to collect the gifts their pets have deposited are given WalMart bags and sent out to collect the leavings. I continue with other infractions that annoy me. Like putting appliances and all the junk you have at home and can't get rid of in my dumpster, not using my recycle barrels for plastic and aluminum, throwing candy wrappers and such on the ground ............. and the list goes on. Afterwards we all hold hands in a circle and sing the Coca-Cola song ................. I did warn you that it is a fantasy.

12 comments:

SkippyMom said...

Oh, if only - and can you taser the bathroom culprits and dog owners while you are at it?

[Did I actually just suggest you TASER someone? Why, yes, yes I did. giggle]

I can picture you in a drill sargeant's uniform with whistle and riding crop barking orders. lol

Are they all gone now - well at least most of them? I hope you can breath easier today and relax.

Hugs!

Katy said...

People are so odd aren't they? Its like the minute they leave their homes they forget that they are human beings. That they are in the presense of other humans and that we all have to do our share by behaving rationally and pick up after ourselves and our pets.

Alix said...

Brilliant! What punishment would you assign to ignorant truck drivers who mow down your tulips? And for that matter... what shall we do with mouthy middle schoolers and idiot drivers?

PS: So sorry I've been MIA, ED. We've been so busy with company and stuff, I've really all but abandoned my blogging. But I'm back and I've come straight over!

Missed you my good friend. So happy to be back with you again.

Brian Miller said...

smiles. strange, that is so similar to my fantasies...lol. i was reading somewhere on a blog about a guy that got so fed up with a neighbors dog, he bagged it all up and then piled it on the doorstep of the neighbor...hasnt had a problem since...

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Tasers.......... will my liability insurance increase? You guys are funny, right there in that fantasy with me. As far as bagging poo and gifting the owners, I confess to having done that a time or two; but I saw the event take place.

Whitney Lee said...

It sounds like you need the fantasies to get through the crappy clean up. (And a happy birthday to your baby today.)

Mamma has spoken said...

In MY fantasy, the owners, realizing their mistakes, will come to you and apologize for what they did THEN ask for the needed materials to clean up THEIR mess AND bring you some homemade cookies or treats to say 'sorry.'

houndstooth said...

I'd seriously lock those bathrooms and make people come in to get a key!

ellen abbott said...

I like the key to the bathroom idea (oh, I know you can't do that). Maybe you could just put up a sign in the bathrooms saying they are under surveillance like the ones in dressing rooms in department stores. Oh, on second thought, that probably wouldn't work as the offenders are probably illiterate as well.

Teresa - in the Middle Side of Life said...

LOL - cracks me up!

I used to have a taser but never had the opportunity to use it.

Meggie said...

I know this dream you have. I used to have it too, when we owned Hotels. The towels continually got stolen, and the messes left were incomprehensible.
Let us hope there really is Karma!!

Pat said...

Some people are just not nice! You know it was just a bunch of kids acting out! (for the bathroom vandalism)

I've been to campgrounds where they have the "poop" bags right by the dog walk. Do you offer that to maybe give them incentive to pick up the poop? Just a suggestion.