Calamity Jim Must Be His Name

My Wi-Fi has been a pain all week. Keeps knocking me off. Can't comment, sometimes can't even read an entire post.....

Woke this morning to a howling wind. Stumbled around letting dogs out and a cat in. Fed the hungry crowd while the coffee brewed, then made my way to the office. Just in time to see an Airstream leaving. I did not check in an Airstream last night, so I check the drop box for a registration and find none. Nice. They stayed for free. This is not a good way to start the day!!

Yesterday was not any better. I had good intentions when I entered my sewing room. I was going to sort all the pieces of fabric I had on my cutting table and give the room a good cleaning. Instead I hunted through my old patterns for doll clothes and made a dress for an orphan doll I found in a thrift store. She was there on a clearance table for only $3. Naked and abandoned. She was clean and had good hair. I paused there and thought that if I did not rescue her she was bound for the landfill!!! Her eye caught mine and, as they say, the rest is history.

She was staring at me beseechingly from my cutting table. In need of clothes and lonely. I know just the little girl for her. My Jailynn will turn 6 very soon. Lucy (sorry, I couldn't wait to name her) will have a marvelous life with my great granddaughter. Before she travels, she will need a wardrobe!! First I made a fetching little print dress with lace on the collar and I was putting the elastic one her panties when a lady presented herself at the check-in counter.

She was in a car and wanted to procure a site for the evening. Her husband was somewhere on the road behind her. We completed the transaction and I assigned a site on the map. When her husband pulled in and stopped in front of the office, he was directly in my blind spot. I did not see just how tall his rig was (this is G rated!).

The site I assigned has electrical wires that cross over-head from pole to pole. These wires supply that side of my park with power ..... So, okay I should not have assigned that site to that particular rig. I confess that my mind was cataloging the fabric stash, searching for another outfit for Lucy and planning dinner. I am a multi-tasker ..... on drugs!! Although I have become accustomed to the meds for the neuropathy, my mind is not as sharp as it used to be.

But ......... one would think that the driver of the rig would have seen the obstacle he was facing and NOT pull in to that site, knowing that he would hit the wires. He pulled in and caught the wires on his air conditioner atop the rig ....... and although he felt the resistance, he plowed forward and not only did he pop that live wire, HE PULLED THE POLE DOWN!

He then called his wife (still in the office) to tell her he "was stuck in some wires". As she repeated this I realized what I had done. I sent help to get him out of the wires, thinking he had merely hit them and they were stuck on something and he needed to remove them to back out. I was wrong. The wife had a look of pure panic on her face as she said she needed to help him and I can only assume there must be a reason she is leading the way in her car, while he drives the truck pulling the 5th wheel.

The helper later reported that the driver was on top of his rig pulling at the live wire. When he was cautioned to wait for help, he replied, "It's broke now, so it's dead." My helper stood back at a safe distance, waiting for someone with the knowledge of electricity came.

Of course, He Who is an electrician (of sorts) is not here. He is on the road with more materials for the bathroom remodel. He does not respond with any words I can repeat here when I reach him and fill him in. He is only 15 minutes away and dumps the trailer, then head down to the site to see the damage.

In the meantime our driver, who is unafraid of live wires carrying enough electricity to power up one side of the park, has disengaged his rig and after some tree trimming has managed to back out and go to another site. He chooses one that has electricity and seems unfathomed by the chaos in his wake. After all I assigned the site, didn't I?

He Who is not at all happy, has to drive back to same store he came from to acquire the necessary parts to temporarily fix the wires to get power to the campers left in the dark (so to speak). He got back and fixed it and ate his lukewarm dinner at around 8:00. Today he will have to look at the downed pole and determine what he needs to reset it. It will definitely involve the renting of some heavy equipment. The stay cost them $30 ..... our cost is yet to be determined, but the couplers he bought last night were around $70.

We are not getting rich here. Unfortunately for me, I have to admit that this adventure (owning a campground) was my idea. What was I thinking??? 

I will confess that, just now, as I watched the Calamity Rig leaving, it brought me a good deal of pleasure to see that  air conditioner sits askew atop the rig. A modicum of justice?

Clever?

Every Spring I bemoan my aching muscles. After my sedentary winter I have to get used to all the physical activity. You would think I would pace myself and start out slowly ........ but, have you ever pulled just one weed? Like potato chips, you cannot stop at one. I always tell myself I will clean just one garden bed at a time, but when I finish one I look over at the other and think I should do just one more, because the clean bed makes the other one look bad. Like painting one room in your house. Then I decide that I have done the center garden and the left garden and surely I should get that garden on the right, balance and all that.

I wake with the sun, despite the room darkening shade I installed. I then feel compelled to work outside until the light begins to fade. That is when I stumble inside and realize that I will have to make something for dinner. Rock soup sounds good to me. Dinner finally ends and I give the kitchen a lick and promise to do better tomorrow (only if it rains and I can't go out to play). I remember to unload the dryer and fold the meager pile of laundry. A scalding hot shower makes me sleepy. But, it is too early for bed.

Too early for who? Really, I am going to bed as soon as I tell you about my latest project gone awry .........  You know those big plastic plates with a clear dome on top that hold sheet cakes for birthdays and such? I found one that I had saved. Don't remember why I saved it, but I had an epiphany! I long for  a green house to start seedlings. I even printed off directions on making one out of plastic water bottles and presented the plans to He Who hates epiphanies. He snorted when he saw it and asked me just how tacky I wanted the place to look.

I reminded him that nothing I could do would ever exceed the sheer horror of his "barn". The more I thought about the plastic bottle green house, though, the more I decided against such a structure. My decision has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that He Who forbade me to try to build one. We all know that if I wanted to I would construct it and put it in the front yard. I realized that the strong winds here would be a big problem.

That is why I decided the cake pan would make an excellent green house! I buy my eggs by the flat. The crates are cardboard and one 30 egg crate and one 18 egg crate fit perfectly on the bottom. I figured the seedlings would be a breeze to transplant in the garden, since I could plant the container as well as the seedling. I prepared my potting soil. I filled several diapers with as much water as they could hold, then tore all the covering away and mixed the little water holding bubbles in the soil.

I was really feeling so clever! I got all my seed packets that I had carefully saved after gathering seed from last years crop. I am so thrifty and ingenious! But, alas, I seem to have forgotten where I stashed all those popsicle sticks I saved every time I saw one. I searched for a bit, then gave up.

I noticed that I had way more plastic knives than spoons and forks. I had already encouraged every one to use them as coffee stirrers to regain balance and order. I have to admit it was bugging me a bit. I was inspired to use them as plant markers!! I nearly dislocated my shoulder patting myself on the back. I grabbed a Sharpie (I thought it was a Sharpie ....) and went to work.

I carefully placed seed in my moisture imbedded soil and marked the knife and stuck it in place. Yesterday I took my "green house" out to bask in the sun. When I brought it in the moisture on the clear dome prevented me from seeing the tiny green shoots of life pushing up out of their piece of soil. This morning I grabbed it and placed it in the sun again as I gathered my tools to start my day.

I hear the temperature will plunge to 27 tonight, so I am diligent as I bring my tomatoes and my green house in. I decide to check on the progress and lift the lid. There they are 48 little green things poking out of the little egg crates. What did I plant? I HAVE NO IDEA. 'Twas not a Sharpie in my hand, but an inferior marker. The moisture washed the names away. I will have to wait until they grow some more and hope that I recognize them! Seems I am not so clever after all.


 

Tom Thumb Wants To Camp Here

My laptop remains gone, though further efforts on the part of He Who knows a little about what he is doing ....... I really need my son to come here and fix it. I am getting used to the desk top, still not too happy about it, but I do have access to the internet, so I will shut up with my belly-aching.

If I take my pain meds as directed, I find that I am ..... out of focus, easily distracted and I have trouble staying on task. It does occur to me that I just described He Who is ADD. He doesn't seem to mind so much. but it scares me a little. I like details and I don't like that nagging feeling that I have forgotten something ......

It is raining and there is a chill in the air. My joints are not happy. I was dragging around this morning in my flannels, sipping coffee, losing the cup, finding the cup and re-heating the coffee. Fed the dogs twice because I forgot I fed them at 5:30 this morning when Oscar started whining. I went back to bed until he started whining again at 8:00. I thought it must be a brand new day.

Anyway, He Who took off to purchase some toilets for the bathhouse. He did offer to let me go with him, but I declined. I knew that all I would see would be plumbing fixtures and even in my distracted state, I didn't think it would be fun. I saw him off and located my coffee mug again (it was in the microwave and already lukewarm again). I had just started to sip at my twice re-heated beverage when my team of canine companions alerted me to the fact that someone was at the store door. I grabbed my trusty fly-swatter to threaten them with and looked at the monitor expecting to see my husband returning for something he forgot.

It was two ladies peering in the window. I shuffled out in my jammies with a sweater atop it all, figuring they weren't dressed much better, and opened the door. I told them I wasn't open yet and gestured to the sign with the store hours on it. They said they just wanted to know what my monthly rates were. So, I invited them in and turned on the lights. I was right about their attire, so I felt pretty comfortable conducting business in my pj's.

They were both talking at once and telling me about "her" son and how they were going to her brother's place to pay for this trailer for him to live in. I started asking pertinent questions at that point. "What year and model is the trailer?" I asked. The woman looked puzzled, "I don't know, all I know is that my brother has it and it is 20 inches long." Hmmmm, 20 inches long, I am already thinking this will be a good blog topic.

Of course, I knew she meant 20 feet and I was already picturing it in my mind. Probably a model from the 60's or 70's in poor condition with a window air conditioner crammed in a cut out hanging off the side. The fact that they wanted to plant the son here in my park made me wonder what he had done in the past to need to live in a campground that his mother was paying for ....

I put my thoughts aside with some effort and tried to focus on what she was saying, while at the same time remembering the new shower curtain liner I bought and meant to put up yesterday and forgot. See what I mean about being distracted? So, she said something again about the trailer being 20 inches long and this time I corrected her .... "you do mean 20 feet, don't you?" "No, I am sure my brother said 20 inches!" She was pretty emphatic about it. I squelched the urge to ask if she was the mother of Tom Thumb.

They left after the confusion over inches and feet, promising to return to show me the trailer. I have to admit that I am not all that excited about seeing it, unless it really is 20 inches long.

The Law of Nature

Spring has officially arrived!! I killed a fly in the kitchen today! The first sign of Spring!

In other news ...... my faithful laptop died. I tried everything in my extremely small arsenal of tricks to revive it. I unplugged and rebooted, only to be subjected to a blue screen and the words "media search: failed" over and over again. I took the battery out, no, I didn't, but He Who was attempting to console me did and the result was the same. I am so lonely without my constant companion. I was listening to an audiobook I had downloaded when it happened. Now I will never know the end!!!!!

He Who would claim to know me very well, got a desk top out to use. I hate it. I have been trying to comment on Blogger all day and it continues to indicate that I do not know what I am doing. The chair I am forced to sit in exacerbates my neuropathy and I am just not happy with this situation. I love the mobility of the laptop. He Who is really quite annoying suggested I use my I-phone to blog. That is not a solution, as I tend to be long on words and short on patience.

I am still here, reading, but not commenting. Another sign of Spring today was the customer in the swim suit asking if there was some kind of law that "keeps y'all from opening the pool up before Memorial Day". While it is true that flies are flying and Daffodils are poking up through the cold ground, it is just not warm enough to fill that pool with cold well water. I told her it was the law of nature. She said "oh" and left.

You Smell Wonderful

There I sat on the exam table in my new doctor's office last week, as he leaned in to with to look inside my ear. "You smell wonderful!" he said.

Okay. How should I respond? I mean, I did shower and wash my hair before leaving the house that morning. Nothing special, just soap, shampoo and water. No perfumes or colognes did I wear, no walking through a fine mist of scented air. I was happy to know that I smelled good.

Then he said, "Where do you work? Do you work in a smoke house with meats?" Apparently I smell like bacon.

We heat our home with a wood stove. We use the fallen trees and cut down dead trees, saw them up and split them. When I say "we" I mean He Who loves a brand new chain on his saw. Most of our trees are hickory. The smell invades every nook and cranny and lingers in our clothes. I no longer smell it, but my children assure me that it is there.

I don't know how I feel about my compliment. Maybe I am every man's dream ........ I smell like bacon. 

Wait, I Spoke Too Soon!

 My life is not boring! I am up and about taking care of chores and such. I am creative and thrifty.

I love Pinterest. That being said, Pinterest is like patterns and recipes. A mere suggestion, not to be mindlessly followed, but an idea to plant in my brain, then ponder until I make it my way.

In my altered state of late, sometimes my ideas do not meet my expectations. I have a tiny crock pot that a normal person would use to keep dips warm. I use it to melt those delicious smelling cubes of wax that are cheap at Walmart. I don't care for the cloying sweet smells of cookies baking or an peach cobbler. If I want to smell that I will do the real thing and bake up some goodies.

I like the clean smelling one's, like "fresh linen", or "ocean breezes". Right now I am enjoying "October Woods". But, as we all know, the scent doesn't last forever. I decided to save this used up wax in a mason jar long before I found a use for it. One day, trolling Pinterest, I saw a use for dryer lint and toilet paper tubes. Someone discovered that stuffing the tube with the dryer lint and then pouring melted paraffin on them would create a good fire starter.

I had used the old wax before with sawdust and newspaper. I mixed the sawdust into the melted wax, then spooned up a glob on the newspaper and rolled it up and stuck it in the freezer. This was a messy affair, but the result was a slow burning fire starter. My supply of saw dust is gone, but I have a steady supply of dryer lint in cold weather. I use a clothes line and take advantage of wind and solar power to dry my laundry when weather permits.

My wax had lost it's pleasant scent today, so I decided to gather all my dryer lint that I save in a small basket next to the dryer, then retrieve the saved toilet paper rollers that have been cleverly hidden in the Kleenex receptacle in the bathroom.

Every day I tried to accomplish at least one task when I was feeling so very awful. Some days it was nothing more than emptying and refilling the ice trays. This was really important, since I would appear to be the only one capable of doing this in this house. I am much better now and able to perform all the necessary tasks related to housekeeping. So much so, that now my goal is to accomplish at least one task that is not absolutely necessary.

Today I set out to make some fire starters. The wax was nice and hot. I had a good sized handful of  dryer lint and 6 cardboard toilet paper holders. It is a simple task. It should be a simple task, I should say.

The little crockpot sits atop the wood stove, which is about counter height. I fill the melted wax right there where it sits. I started by trying to stuff the rolls with lint. A child could do it, but today the  very first tube bent into itself and I dropped my wad of lint on the floor. Toni Louise and Martha, the boy cat, decided that I must be tempting them with something to eat or a fun game to play and they pounced on my lint and divided it among themselves.

Toni Louise was trying to spit out the lint that had stuck to the inside of her mouth as I caught her and took a big wad away. I left her coughing like she had a hairball and caught the cat as he was rolling the wad of lint in front of him. His version of chasing a ball, I suppose. Now I had enough lint for only 4 of the 6 rolls.

I was annoyed with my fur children and just wanted to be done so that I could put another piece of scented wax in the crockpot to cover the smell of wood smoke that invades every pore of my house. I had forgotten to grab some pot holders and tapped the crockpot with my fingers to see how hot it was. Remember, I am under the influence of drugs. I decided that it wasn't that hot and I picked it up and started pouring ....

I have one of those porcelain contraptions that comes with those rings that you burn to keep mosquitos away. It is perfect for setting the roll in the center to fill it with wax. The crockpot got hotter as I attempted to pour and I must have bumped the roll as I tried to pour quickly. The roll fell over and I poured wax on the top of the wood stove.

You would think I would just give up on this project and wait until later, wouldn't you? You would be wrong. With hot wax drying on my hands I procured those pot holders and went on to the next roll, then the next. On the last one as I tried to tip the pot completely upside down, in order to get as much wax as I could, I dropped the crockpot.

Yes, I did. Crockpots bounce, just so you know. It bounce on top of the wood stove, and as I attempted to catch it with my pot holder hands, it slipped out of my grasp and hit the floor with a  big clump sound. I closed my eyes as it bounced again before coming to rest at my feet.

It did not break! It will never look the same and it still works, but the crockery part sits at an odd angle inside it's housing. Maybe I should grab a little nap now.

I spoke too soon in my last post, life is not boring.

Life is Mellow and Boring

Finally! I saw my new primary care provider (PCP). I already have an appointment to see the gastroenterologist next week. My new PCP increased the dosage of my pain meds for the neuropathy and I am still getting used to that.

I nap at odd times, but my energy level is much better when I am awake. Just in time for Spring. I can't wait to turn some soil and sow some seed. A warm front has melted all of the snow, well, just a few patches left in the shady spots. It is supposed to be warm for the next week. I wonder if I might start to see some daffodils try to make their way up.

As soon as I get an all clear from the doctor I will be heading north for a whirlwind visit with my kids. We have a wedding coming up in September. My baby girl, Adrienne. I am really fond of my new son-in-law and can't wait to see everyone. The purpose of my trip is to shop for fabric. Now, we all know I love fabric, but I will be flying, so my space is limited. That's a good thing. I don't need much space for my clothes, so I will pack them in the smaller piece of luggage, then put that piece in the larger piece .......

This is pretty boring, must be the drugs.

Please Continue To Hold .......

Finally got word from my clinic about my new insurance. Not good news. They have been in negotiation with the insurance company since October and still have not come to resolution.

I had no choice but to call the primary care provider they assigned to me, only to find out that this particular physician is no longer in this office and that I would need to call the insurance company to choose another physician. Choose? Does this mean I actually have a choice? Well, only within the network.

I called and talked to a disembodied voice that asked for my birthdate three times. I enunciate quite well, I have been told. This must only apply to voices that have a body attached to them. She said, "Let me get someone who can help you." and then another disembodied voice assured me of my importance, then went on to announce that due to the high volume of calls today, my wait may be longer than usual and my call would be answered in the order it was received.

I put the phone on speaker and went about my business. I took the dogs out, then mopped the floor in the store before putting an ice cream freezer in place. Folded laundry and piddled around in my sewing room looking for all the scraps from my blue jean quilt. The pockets from all those jeans I cut up for that quilt. Did not locate them, but I will!

This took up the better part of an hour or so. I sat down to catch up with the Land of Blog and was engrossed in Hillmomba when a real voice cut through Beethoven's Fifth. I was so shocked, I nearly dropped the phone!! More than that, it was a person speaking American English!

She fulfilled my request and I called the office of my "chosen" physician back and made an appointment for Thursday! Now all I need is for this doctor to refer me to the gastroenterologist and I will finally be able to get started with all the testing. I wanted to be done with that by now, but, such is life.


Now I can drag out the ladder to find those pockets! I am making a head board for my bed. Ponder that for a bit. I made a king size quilt out of thrift store jeans. I like it so much that I decided to make a padded headboard to match. I saved everything in case I ever needed it ....... I used the inseams to make a rug. I used scraps to make another rug out of rug canvas and 3" strips that I painstakingly tied to the canvas. But the pockets are somewhere in my sewing room. The fly fronts and zippers, to.

You never know when these things might be just the thing you are looking for. I want pockets on at least one of the 19 X 19" padded boards I will attach to the wall. To put the remote in! He Who is married to me is so lucky! I am clever AND thrifty!

Door Update

If you read yesterday's post, you know which door I am referring to.

I made it quite clear that I did not want a new door. That would make the fact that I had purchased a used door at a salvage store be all for not. I suggested that the door might un-warp if he put the correct hinges on. I have no idea if that is even possible and I confess that my mind was buzzing with ideas on how to re-purpose a warped door. Just in case. One has to be prepared, you know.

So he hung the warped door and it would not shut. He took it down and went outside to split some firewood or sit in his car and watch movies on his smart phone. No, the volume on the phone would never be loud enough for that. When he came back in, I told him that I would be happy to prepare our supper ....... as soon as he cleaned up the mess he left on my counter.

This condition must have been a shock, since I usually follow along behind his projects and put away all of his tools and spare bits and screws and nails and bits of drywall. You get the picture.

He sort of cleaned up. Really just relocated it. But, he hung the door and it fit! I was impressed. You will recall that this is the door to the "furnace room". Now, we all know that I would not be content with a space that had only one purpose. This room also houses the various brooms and dusting supplies, along with the vacuum.

This morning when I got up and was going about my business, I meandered over to the newly hung door to retrieve said vacuum and made an alarming discovery. The door won't open far enough to get the vacuum out.

Let's see, it took nine years for him to re-hang this door ....... I am afraid his solution might be a new vacuum.