Friday, April 27, 2012

Dr. Oz and Hygiene Habits

Each day turns into the next and I keep putting one foot in front of the other and tackle the next task. Time is relative. I spent yesterday taking everything off the porches and then putting some of it back after cleaning all surfaces. The day before that I shopped for store supplies and did some painting and cleaned the restrooms. The day before that I mowed and then painted the new building that houses the pool pumps. The day before that I mowed .........

Some days I cook, some days we just grab whatever we find and eat, shower and collapse for the night. No matter the amount accomplished, there is always so much more to do. He who does not listen to his wife pulled a muscle in his lower back and has been in pain for weeks now. I keep telling him that he has to give his body a chance to heal if he wants to get better. He went to a chiropractor. He told him the same thing. I love it when I am proven right ...... even if it was a chiropractor.

He is still taking calls to help stranded motorists and retrieve abandoned vehicles from the roadside. One such vehicle was full of stuff. In the front seat was a box containing a surround sound system. In case you are wondering what becomes of such things; after a specified amount of time and effort to alert the owner to the whereabouts, it becomes the property of the service that picked it up. Kind of like unclaimed luggage at the airport.

He who loves all things electrical and noise was awarded the system. He eagerly set about stringing wires and such around our very small living space and hooking up all theses speakers and various components and had it all set for a sound test. He turned on the TV and Dr. Oz was on. He who loves sound is not familiar with Dr. Oz, never having watched his show before .......

I was about the business of preparing a meal that did not involve milk and a bowl and a spoon. I was half listening to Dr. Oz and he was talking about the things in his life that gave him a sense of well-being. I don't know which was funnier; the look on my husband's face as he listened to Dr. Ox wax eloquent about the virtues of using baby wipes on his nether regions after relieving himself or the fact that the sound system was defective. Really too funny.

Dr. Oz went on and on about the texture and softness of the aloe wipes as he who was disgusted watched in horror. Then he made a statement about the wipes being flushable. Fatal error. Don't tell the man who has snaked out the sewer to find wads of them plugging up the plumbing that these things should be flushed. And don't even mention tampons to him!

It was good to laugh. Dinner has been served and cleared. The last reservation has arrived. Time to hit the pillow and escape for a few hours. My canine contingent has finally settled back into a routine since the death of Emmy. I still dream about her from time to time and think I hear her cry out in the wee hours of the morning.

I have realized that she was pretty miserable for the last 6 months of her life. Her mate, Oscar, has slowed down considerably. He doesn't even bark now when he hears a stranger. He refuses to go outside unless I stand with him, all the while glancing over his shoulder to make sure that I am there. I have been giving him extra attention and he sleeps snug against my leg every night. Wall-E has abandoned me to go back to his previous spot next to he who loves him most. Toni Louise is a sweet girl, but prefers to occupy her own space at the foot of the bed. My bedfellows await me ......

13 comments:

Linda O'Connell said...

Kathy, I laughed out loud at Dr. Oz and the butt wipes. Your life sounds like it is about to get in high gear. I'll bet you sleep well.

Joanne Noragon said...

May he who never find a baby wipe in the puumbing and may she who --oh, wait,--Kathy, have a good season.

Brian Miller said...

ugh on the job he who had to do with the wipes...its a conspiracy between the plumbers and the wipe companies you know...smiles...

SkippyMom said...

What is it with dachshunds in particular that they have to touch there human while they sleep. All of dachshies have done this and no matter how you nudge them over [to get more room for yourself] or reposition them [because it is hot and you are boiling with hot weiner dog on you] they still manage to scooch right back to touching you. It is like the game of "He's touching me." that kids play in the back seat when we are driving.

It's funny with Spot because she always sleeps against me, but the minute Dad gets in bed she beelines between us to touch him too. Drives him batty. heehee

Take care and enjoy your sleep. I am sure you need it extra going into high gear. I know with the busy season here for Pooldad he just wants a bite to eat and the bed when he gets home at 10 pm. Poor guy. He didn't even make it through movie and pizza night tonight.

SkippyMom said...

*their, not there. I am forever doing that. grrrrr

mamahasspoken said...

Ah the passing of time, the greatest healer. Glad to read that things are getting better.

Pat said...

I love your descriptions of every day life. You DO make them sound interesting. I've NEVER watched Dr. Oz, and now I know why! I could just imagine your husband listening to Dr. Oz talking about wiping his butt, especially in surround sound. Now THAT is funny! Have a good weekend and don't work too hard!

Erik's RV Blog said...

You are too funny, I can actually picture the events as I read about them.

She who doesn't blog anymore it seems got a good laugh from your post as well.

Have a great weekend!

Erik

Chickadee said...

I love Dr. Oz, but he's a little too obsessed with #2 and its associated habits. I suppose we should be vigilant with our bathroom habits, but I'm sorry, I can't look at my poo before I flush. (Too bad THAT wasn't the episode playing for hubby) :)

Teresa said...

LOL - i'm glad my husband didn't see that or he'd be trying to flush things that shouldn't be flushed. we've had more than one plumber say that those flushable wipes should never, ever be flushed.

you make everyday mundane chores sound like so much fun. well, maybe not fun but definitely interesting.

our yorkie loves to sleep right on top of me, too. drives me nuts because she's like little furnace. i'm forever moving her over.

Lorenza said...

I just can imagine his face listening to Dr. Oz!
Sure things have not been easy for you and Oscar.
Take care
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

@ly said...

Dogs mourn just like we do. We had 2 dogs...lost one and for the longest time the 1 dog still looked for the other in his fav spot. Broke my heart. But in time..that changes. This dog is now 14 years old and wearing diapers but still pretty spry for a dog of that age. This will be my last pet. When we lose this one... I am going to give being pet-free a try.

Sextant said...

My wife occasionally watches Dr Oz. It appears to me that every day he offers 10 secrets to a better something or other that usually involves supplements or some weird substance that has to be in some manner prepared. 10 secrets X 5 days X 52 weeks =2600 secrets per year that Dr. Oz is giving us and we should be able to live forever. At an average cost of $10 per secret per month that is $312,000 per year. Dr Oz never stops so at some point your supplement costs would exceed the national debt.