My Dog Ate My Vicodin!

I was plagued by an intense headache yesterday .......... you know the kind that gives you a warning before it arrives. I was about my business of taking reservations and checking the e-mails associated with such when I could suddenly no longer see out of my right eye. Well, half of the vision in my eye was obscured with dancing silver fish thingies squiggling about. Past experience has taught me to not ignore this foretelling of pain. I immediately dosed myself with Tylenol, caffeine, and chocolate. A bartender taught me this trick and it has been known to work quite well. Even if it does not squelch the pain entirely, it dulls it down to bearable. I closed down the computer and pulled the shades ...... just in case the sun might appear.

After sitting quietly for half an hour and regaining full vision, I sadly noted to myself that I had not caught it quite in time. Going to bed to sleep it off was not an option, since he who could take my place was at his other job. I did console myself with the knowledge that even if he had been here and I had managed to drift into sleep, he would have awakened me to see if I felt any better. So, I made a little cocoon for myself on the couch with the dogs and put the phone on a pillow to muffle the sound and moving very carefully and slowly spent the afternoon answering phone calls in a hushed voice and checking in three campers. I dosed myself every two hours with aspirin, then Tylenol, then Ibuprofen. I do, after all, believe in equal opportunity and giving each drug a chance to work a miracle.

When he who was concerned arrived home (having had a call from me to express my distress), he was happy to report that he had a lone Vicodin left from his last dental emergency! I accepted his offering eagerly and after popping it in half, took one half and felt the pain retreat in about 20 minutes. I slept like a baby and awoke feeling so much better. The sun was even shining! I drank my coffee and began my day. Looking forward to planting some Black Eyed Susan's along the fence. I preformed all my morning ablutions, brushing my teeth, washing my face, batting at my bed head and carefully flushing away any allergens that might be lurking in my nasal cavities with my neti pot.

I mounted my trusty golf cart and drove to site 2 where my kamper buddy Yvonne had the plants that she carefully saved for me when her sister-in-law thinned her beds. I loaded them on the cart and hoe in hand set about planting. The soil here is so wet that I could have dug the holes with my hands. I was happily tucking my little plants in and envisioning them swaying in the breeze with their happy faces against the red fence ............. not again, the squiggling silver fish are at the outer edges of my vision. Maybe it just the sun reflected on the leaves of the plants? No, definitely having tunnel vision now. As I am coming round the bend, he who mows, waves at me from his mower and I stop. He mouths are you alright? I shake me head in the negative and immediately regret doing so. He cuts the engine and instructs me to go lay down and take the other half of the Vicodin. Good idea.

I manage to navigate the cart to the front door and walk carefully inside. I was on the sofa when I popped the pill in half .......... where did I put the half I didn't take? On the table beside me, thinking at the time, that I should really put it in something so I wouldn't lose it and the dogs wouldn't get it. Did I? I cannot remember doing so and I can't really see now. I am trying to be very careful as I feel all along the table top. I can't find it and total panic seizes me along with a rush of adrenalin. Not good with the impending headache, just in case you ever need to know. Next thing I do is gather each of my animals into my arms. Why? I don't know. Maybe I am thinking I will be able to tell by touch if they have Vicodin in their system. I am about to call he who would rescue me when I remember where I put the Vicodin.

I still have a headache and am hoping it will go away when this next storm system rolls through this afternoon. But ........... the dogs are all okay!