Humana Could Learn a Thing or Two!

 Still Friday here and the irritations of life are trying to stress me out! I got an email warning me that my prescriptions were perilously low. They aren't, but as I was filling the pill boxes anyway, I called Humana.

The prompt warned me that there was a high number of calls and suggested I use the internet. I hate calling almost as much as navigating their website. It is not user friendly at all and will close down on you without warning. Calling isn't that great either, but a little quicker. The automated voice asked for the birthdate, then asked that I verify my zip code and then asked for my member number. After every answer the voice will repeat what you answered and you have to say yes to proceed. I have my phone on speaker and just shout my response. Once they have decided you are who you are, the automated voice will tell you how many prescriptions need to be refilled and then ask if you want to have them all refilled, or if you want to hear the list and decide. I always want to listen to the list in case something has been discontinued by my doctor.

This is another painstaking process in which the drug name is often mispronounced and then repeated if you choose to order it. I finally finish my order and verify twice the address and method of payment. At the end the voice will ask if you would like to do a phone survey and I always answer "NO".

Having taken care of mine, I then call back to take care of HeWho knows not what he takes and lacks the patience to deal with the process. I learned long no to try to refill both of our prescriptions with just one call. Same thing again and I listen to the 6 prescriptions that have popped up as needing refills. I okay 5 of them and am in the process of verifying address and payment when the store phone rings. It is someone with a reservation today, checking on her reservation. I walk to the desk where HeWho is preparing a bank deposit and has his stuff atop my reservation book. He decides to take over the Humana call and I say, just answer yes to all the remaining questions.

He decides to challenge the payment method because he doesn't recognize the last 4 numbers of MY credit card. I finish assuring the reservation that her reservation is alive and well and there he sits looking astonished as the voce is now asking what payment method to use in lieu of the one already on file.

I take the phone from his extended arm and now I have to go dig out the credit card in a hurry, lest I have to start all over again. I verify the number, the expiration date and security code twice and then my address again. Then, the automation informs me that there is a problem with 3 of the 5 ordered prescriptions and asks if I would like to speak to a representative. Of course I want to know what problem there is. Another prompt telling me that the call lines are especially busy today and would I like to order my prescriptions on-line. No, at this point I want to go howl at the moon.

No wait to speak of. Once again I have to verify date of birth, zip code and "membership" number. Membership would imply that we are in this together and I would never be a member of such redundancy as this. I am already highly irritated that a task that should take minutes is already eating up the better part of an hour. Then she questions my authority to order drugs for someone else and tells me she needs to have verbal consent from the Member before we continue. He yells that he gives me the authority to take care of his drugs.

 She hums and haws and wonders aloud what I might be referring to, because she sees no problem with the prescriptions. She seem to think I am the one saying something is wrong. Deep breath and I slowly explain to her that I did not choose the refills, her automated system did and that her automated system told me there was a problem. I resist the urge to ask her to repeat what I have said so that we can VERIFY it. She tells me to wait a moment AND PUTS ME ON HOLD. Then comes back (maybe she asked her supervisor for help?) to tell me she cannot find anything wrong and if there is something else she can help me with today. I just want to have this one task DONE, so I say no. Then she asks if I would be willing to do a short survey!!!!!

I can feel my heart pounding in my temples and I say, "You REALLY do not want me to do a survey, sweetie, it would not shed a kind light on you. I am old and I am pissed off right now with your entire process, goodbye!"

I am just finishing up with the pill box of HeWho is oblivious and start to snap the lids closed and the entire week of pills flips over and dumps onto the counter. I wanted to cry, but the phone was ringing with a third call from someone try to make a reservation for next month. First call she asked for two 30 amp sites together. No problem, I take the information and complete the task. Calls back wondering if I could put them in 50 amp sites because she is not sure what her friend needs and she is sure she can hook up on either one. It doesn't make a difference to her. It does to me. I have fewer 50 amp sites than 30 and if she does not require 50 amps, she could be the reason I have to turn someone away that needs 50 amps. I suggest she call her friend and call me back.

She does call me back and then wants to chat about which sites might be available in the entire month of October weekends. I finally sort out all the pills and place them where they should be. No easy task, since some of his pills are to be taken at night. I dump both day and night pills together in my box, because I can easily fish out the night pills when I take my morning pills. Never would I ever do that for his pills, as it would require my attention every single day.

It is now 3:15 and I have answered countless calls about nonsense and tried to explain how to get into a site three times to the same person and finally sent HeWho over there to show them, warning him NOT to just throw the driver to the ground and park it for him. Now I am sitting here wondering about my ability to continue with the day. The caller just now says, "I been wonderin', do I gotta pay to make a reservation?" I replied, "To make a reservation I would need something to secure it, either a deposit or a credit card number." He said, "You ain't gotta be such a smartass."

I didn't even let my exasperation into my tone as I explained this. What is wrong with people?

Walmart Pharmacy has an automated system that requires very little time and is extremely simple. You call the number on your bottle of pills and use the prescription number on the bottle to order your refill. The pharmacist or the technician gets a printout of the information and the prescriptions are either filled or you doctor's office is notified if it is out of refills. Humana should take a lesson!