Sunday, December 6, 2009

3:00 AM Games

Sandpaper toe pads against my bare skin as dog legs stretch in preparation for a run outside. Really, it is 3:00 AM. The middle of the night. For the past two weeks or more the dogs have awakened me to go out in the 3 o'clock hour. I am already awake....... waiting. Waiting to see what method they will use tonight to get me out of the bed.


Love of my life usually sleeps blissfully through the 3 AM pee-pee break, but I know he is awake. He went to he bathroom and stuffed more wood in the wood stove not 20 minutes ago....... that is the reason I am awake. He has no idea how to be quiet.


Wall-E is walking around on top of the covers preparing to leap to the floor. Emmy is stretching, her little toes against my arm. Oscar stretches against my leg, Oscar of sandpaper toe pads and nails that need to be clipped. I want to push him away, but the game is on. You know the game if you have children...... you have all played it.


I am lying as still as possible. I have been getting up every night in the middle of the night for two weeks or more! It is his turn! And I know he is awake! I can tell by the way he is breathing. I can feel his awareness of the dogs. He is playing, too. Oscar is now emitting his low whimper. His legs are too short to jump to the floor. Wall-E, in he meantime is tapping across the floor (his nails need clipping, too). Emmy waits patiently for the male dogs to awaken a person to transport her to the back yard so that she can relieve herself. I continue to pretend to be asleep.... lying very, very still. He is also lying still and trying to breathe evenly (he is very good at this). I know he wants to turn over, but he is afraid to, any movement and I will say, "It's your turn." He knows this and he continues to lie still.


Wall-E jumps back into the bed and tries to pick up my hand with his nose..... I stay limp. Oscar takes the whining up a notch and move to the bench at the foot of the bed. Emmy waits patiently. Wall-E leaps back onto the floor and dances across the floor encouraging Oscar to try to jump down. He jumps up to bed and back to the floor demonstrating how it is done. Oscar is now whining in earnest and I cough!


I lost because I coughed! Not fair! I have been sick and for that reason he should let me win, but no, he knows the game too well. So, off I shuffle to the back door with three dogs railing behind me at 3:04 AM. Tonight I will have cough drops close by..... and I will win!

23 comments:

ellen abbott said...

Just poke him in the ribs and tell him it's his turn.

otin said...

LOL! I live in a world where I pervert everything!

"stuffed more wood in the wood stove not 20 minutes ago..."

I can't help it if my mind is in a gutter!

It is his turn tonight, don't make a peep!

SkippyMom said...

Dachshunds gotta' love 'em. LOL persistant little buggers.

I feel your pain. :)

Carol said...

Only ONCE a night?? You lucky dog loving soul! Mine do this like every 2 hours. I don't mind, I have to go too! SIGHHHH Old age, diabetes and spoiled yorkies will get you every time! errrr, every couple of hours.

Brian Miller said...

hope the cough drops help! my cat does the same thing around 4 AM...really i am just a heavy sleeper around that time...smiles.

Rae said...

That sounds exactly like my place. We do that routine every night too. Lucky for me he will get up and take a turn, but not without prompting. Don't you just love dogs that can't tell time and want to go out in the middle of the night. Then they get to lounge around all day and sleep.

squawmama said...

Oh boy that would not be good for me... I would be making him get up... ha ha As if that would work! Hopefully they will stop this routine very soon!

Have Fun & Travel Safe
Donna

Kathy G said...

We have the same problem with the cats in our house. However, since DH was the one who trained them to want their food at 4:30 by getting up at that time on a regular basis, he's the one who has to do it!

Nancy said...

Oh, you are so patient! Husband would have to do this job. In fact, when he is home he always gets up with Lucy. But she gets up at 7:00 - 7:30. 3:00 is, well, just mean!

otin said...

LOL Only I would think that way! haha

Alix said...

You coughed! LOL. That'll teach you Kathy, my dear.

That happens occasionally with Augie (my Doxie) if we allow him to tank up on water late in the evening. Usually, though, we take him out just before we go to bed and he sleeps straight through. And Augie has a sixteen year old bladder! I'm really proud of him. Sometimes he will start to stir before I wake up and if he has to go badly will gently wheeze. I know he means business after a long night, but he rarely makes me get up at night. Wouldn't matter if he did. I'm usually awake. Menopause, you know.

♥ Alix

Cathy said...

Hello Kathy
You really must learn the kicking legs routine - oh sorry dear, didn't mean to kick you, my restless leg syndrome is playing up. Seeing as you're wide awake maybe you could see to the dogs lol
Take care
Cathy
ps I hope your little elves haven't found my nicely organised boxes lol

lifein3dee said...

ROFL This is hilarious! And I've been there myself. Use the cough drops!

Sunny said...

Oh I can relate. For the past couple of weeks, my cat Lilly has been waking me up in the middle of the night for no good reason. I stumble around the bedroom while Lucy, Molly and Hubby take over my spot in bed! Just not fair!
Sunny :)

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Thankfully ours sleep through the night! I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep if they woke me but Himslef can sleep for Britain even after being woken so it would be his task to let them out for a wee if they started those shenanigans!

Take a sleeping pill, you'll win!

Jilly said...

I never played that game. I just kicked until he got up. Works every time :)

deborahjcolburn said...

you are too funny...can't wait to see you, Drew, the dogs and my cat and my camper...and the Christmas Tree in my bedroom...I'm just so excited...it's the little things

Bee and Rose said...

My parents have been going through this with their black lab...he suddenly has a 2 am potty time!

The Good Cook said...

When Holly Bear was just a wee pup she had to go at 3:00 am.. always up to me... now that she's 1 year old she sleeps and snores through the night.

I'd make TBHITW get up now.. tell yours it's his turn!!

Stephanie said...

The games people play - hah!

Jo said...

I used to have an outside door off my bedroom, and I had a cat that went in and out, in and out, all night long. It's exhausting.

You must try not to cough next time. *heh*

Pat said...

LOL! I was laughing to myself the whole time reading this. Reminds me of those midnight feedings. I'd shake the bed, and nudge my husband and then fake sleeping, ANYTHING to try to get him up to take a feeding once in awhile!

Teresa - in the Middle Side of Life said...

LOL! I know this game, too. Maisey will try to get me up by doing the same thing - burrowing under my hand so I can pet her. Ron would love for her to pay him that much attention and all she can see is that I'm "not" paying her attention. I told him it's because she knows he's in her hip pocket and she's trying to win me over.

We have a doggie door so neither of us has to get up during the night.