Bait and Switch

 I am woefully behind in writing. I eat, weed, mow, cook, do laundry, paint, check in campers and sleep a few hours, then get up and do it again. Every single day. Writing calls for more than 5 minutes of uninterrupted peace and quiet.

My youngest used to refer to it as "Mommy needs a piece of quiet". It is in short supply. My mind hurts from dealing with people. Seems like I complain on a daily basis, but there seems to be a lot to complain about.

Earlier this month I was forced to evict a tenant. There may be some folks who think I relish the act of doing this. I don't. You may rest assured that if I am evicting someone, they have earned it.

This particular one was set in motion almost immediately, despite the assurance that compliance with my rules would be a priority. I was hesitant to even allow the person to stay here. It was a bait and switch situation. I thought the tenant I would be renting to was the man's mother. She seemed decent enough, as well as her husband. Then they show up with her son and his teenaged son. I was told they had a stellar reputation and never bothered anyone. She even told me to call her if I had a problem .... and that's when I knew I would have a problem.

I went over the rules with the man who would be occupying the site. I enunciate quite well and have a good command of the English language (or so I have been told). The kid was clean cut and polite and I was not at all worried about him. The man, who was disabled due to his own teen stupidity, just struck me wrong.

As is usually the case, my first impression proved to be right. They were paying for two adults, the man and his son, to live in the camper. Not even a week went by before the complaints started rolling in. Quiet time is 10 pm to 8 am. The man seemed to want to wander through the park at all hours of the night and early morning. Not quietly, but with music blasting from his phone. This woke up some of the tenants who work all day and do not appreciate being awakened. Then there was the cigarette butts littering his site and the park. This was annoying to me more than anyone and I never addressed this particular habit with him.

There was so much else to address. I took note that a woman was spending her days and nights there. She seemed to be confused about which way to go on a one way drive and I spoke to her twice about speeding. I was up at 6 am one morning and watched her come flying up the one way drive the wrong way, then out of the park. I was in my garden and the tenant came merrily down the private drive dragging his trash can behind him and made the mistake of greeting me in a cheery manner. I asked him if the woman was living with him and he told me that she was not. Then I addressed her driving habits with him, since he was the tenant and she was his guest. I asked who exactly she was and was told she was his "care giver" .... and his girlfriend. I told him then that she was violating his tenancy and there was an extra charge for overnight guests. He chose to just stare dumbly at me. I reminded him that I had told his mother that I would try this arrangement for one month and if I had problems, he would have to leave.

There is a sign at the entrance to the park that instructs visitors to register at the office. I am unsure if any of the "visitors" to his site could read or follow simple instructions. I always find out about tenant shenanigans after the fact. I instruct people to call and wake me up while it is happening. Truly I wish they would. I could call law enforcement to give me a hand in removing them from the park if I was called while the event was happening. He apparently had quite a few visitors at night, after the office is closed under the cover of darkness.

I even printed out the rules with instructions to read, sign and return the copy to the office. He was presented with the rules while a gang of his friends were taking advantage of our pool one afternoon. He crumpled them in his hand and sealed his fate. He is a recovering addict on probation, gee I wish I had been told this BEFORE I rented the site to him.

He woke his neighbor in the wee hours of the morning in his last week here. HeWho went down and told him he had to go. My best work camper ever, reinforced this by telling him the same thing. so, the Friday of the July 4th weekend, the man calls and asks where to pay his rent. I told him he would not be paying rent, that he had to be out by noon on the last day of his month here. He decides to argue with me. 

Arguing with me is never a good choice. It would be like arguing with Judge Judy, you won't win. He keeps telling me he did not disturb his neighbor, it was the other people behind him. Kept trying to talk over me, but that didn't work for him either. I finally got his attention by telling him to shut his mouth and listen to my words and told him in no uncertain terms that he would need to be out by noon on the assigned day or I would have a deputy escort him off the property.

He complied and was out long before noon. Gone but not forgotten. Two days later the phone calls started. His girlfriend/caregiver called. No greeting or identifying herself "I just want to know what you have against me," she yelled. I answered with, "I am not sure, since I have no idea who you are." "Oh, yes you do" she counters, "You kicked him out and said it was because of me."

I told her I had nothing to say to her. She was not the tenant, just a trespasser who decided to bring a group of people to my facilities without paying and I solved the problem by removing the tenant. I hung up.

Now they are calling incessantly, or they were since I have now blocked the number. What do they want? Do they think harassing me will make me tell them to come back and live here? She told me they have an attorney and are going to get me in trouble with the Better Business Bureau. Once again, what does she thing she is accomplishing?

Just annoying, like a fly buzzing around that eludes all efforts to get swatted.