Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Remember the story about the little boy hitting himself in the head with the hammer? When asked why he was hitting himself, he replied that it felt so good when he stopped.
I think, maybe, that chronic pain is like that. You become accustomed to the pain. So much so that you don't realize you are hurting until you take a pain reliever.
While I wait for my new insurance policy to kick in, I have been carefully hoarding the prescription I have for pain. Well, I was, until I actually read the bottle and discovered the refill. So, for the past week I have been taking the medication as prescribed. I am much nicer to be around, although, not very productive. I seem to have developed a great capacity to stare mindlessly at the TV and do absolutely nothing.
In my drug-free state I would have guilt feelings for doing nothing, but in this new pain-free universe, guilt does not factor in. I do manage a few tasks, such as cooking and laundry, then feel insanely proud of myself.
Last night, for instance, I pulled all the left-overs out of the fridge and prepared a meal of sorts. In doing so, I got a little carried away and cleaned out a lot of stuff, like expired pickles and such ...... then felt so accomplished. A good nap makes me feel so righteous!
My only concern is ....... what happens when I stop taking these capsules of magic?